Monday, March 3, 2008

I Believe that the Word "Synergy" has Synergy with a "Pile-O-Crap"

Synergy - A mutually advantageous conjunction or compatibility of distinct business participants or elements (as resources or efforts).

That is synergy defined by my good friends over at Merriam-Webster. Normally I would give them the benefit of the doubt, but this time I have to call them out. Synergy, is not as defined above, instead it is really a corporate BS word. Basically, if you are ever in a meeting, and someone starts spouting on about synergy, it is ok to start napping or checking out the danishes on the food table; because what the presenter is about to say will have absolutely NO impact on your day to day operations.

This word was invented by corporations to speculate on future possibilities. It just sounded better then saying "We think that SOMETIME in the future their MAY be a way to make these things work better and more efficiently together." The problem with that statement is that it is too vague and speculative. Now they just use synergy and it is all OK. When airlines want to merge, they make it sound all good by spouting on about synergies, as if this magical process will make everyone crap tons of money. The problem is this rarely happens. Ask K-mart about it's synergies with Sears, or maybe Cerberus and it's synergies with Chrysler.

Bottom line, when people higher then you on the food chain start talking about synergies, start looking for a new job. And if you are the person spouting off about "synergistic opportunities", realize that everyone you are talking to knows it is straight up BS.

Until tomorrow at about 6:30 A.M., I am going to explore possible synergies between myself and my bed. Later.


Rosiecat said...

Synergy between me and my pillow: now that's MY kind of synergy, JD!

But seriously, peanut butter and chocolate really do have synergy together. Or maybe it's me, peanut butter, and chocolate. Ooh, threesome!

JD said...

i often have synergy between myself and my pillow as well. It is almost the best kind, but the best I reserve for my wife. I was more talking about synergy in a business sense. That idea IS a bunch of crap.